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Thursday, August 31, 2006 

Great One Liners

I just felt that i have tried thinking too much about too many things , I have post few one liners which i enjoyed
  • If your parents never had children, chances are you won't, either.
  • Join the army, see the world, meet interesting people, and kill them.
  • Until I was 13, I thought my name was 'Shut Up.'
  • Is man one of God's blunders or is God one of man's blunders?
  • I've never been drunk, but often I've been over served.
  • Marriage is one of the chief causes of divorce.
  • Work is fine if it doesn't take up too much of your time.
  • When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
  • Everyone has a photographic memory; some people just don't have film.
  • Life is unsure; always eat your dessert first.
  • Smile -- it makes people wonder what you're up to.
  • The hardest part of skating is the ice.
  • The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot; the guy who invented the other three, he was the genius.
  • The trouble with being punctual is that there's no one there to appreciate it.
  • If you tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe, he'll believe you. But if you tell him a park bench has just been painted, he has to touch it to be sure.
  • It's not the fall that kills you; it's the sudden stop at the end.
  • Never underestimate the power of very stupid people in large groups.
  • If you can't convince them, confuse them.

Can you people share some oneliners which you did enjoy in the past and post it my comments section...Just out of curiosity, to know what attracts different people, i would have been oblivious to them.

A few quotes (not necessarily one liners I read in the recent past in quote a day blog feed)

"He's turned his life around. He used to be depressed and miserable. Now he's miserable and depressed." - David Frost

"Advertising may be described as the science of arresting the human intelligence long enough to get money from it." - Stephen Leacock
"The time to relax is -- when you don't have time for it." - Sidney J. Harris (took some time just to understand this ;)

"Horse sense is the thing a horse has which keeps it from betting on people." - W. C. Fields

and my favorite -

"An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn't happen today." - Laurence J. Peter

Capitalism spreads unequal wealth - Socialism spreads equal poverty.

There should be a better way to start a day
Than waking up every morning


Quitters never win and winners never quit but those who never win and never quit are idiots.

I am really enoying the one liners :)))).Hopefully it rows exponentially!!

hmmm..check out these:

1) Women always inspire us to great things; and prevents us from achieving them

2) 76.2% of all statistics are made up on the spot..

3) You cannot get to the top by sitting on your bottom

....wasted my precious time reading ur blogs & the comments...

sara try writing meaningful/useful blogs...?!

guess me (i will reveal next time)

I really can understood one thing.you must be real good wisher to the society and a good friend of mine..futility is a very relative term and respect your view as well.. wait for the the you would reveal yourself!!!

1. Save The Whales. Collect The Whole Set.



2, A Day Without Sunshine Is Like, Night.



3. On The Other Hand, You Have Different Fingers.



4. I Just Got Lost In Thought. It Wasn't Familiar Territory.



5. 42.7% Of All Statistics Are Made Up On The Spot.



6. Light Travels Faster Than Sound, Which Is Why Some People Appear
Bright
Until You Hear Them Speak



7. I Feel Like I'm Diagonally Parked In A Parallel Universe.



8. Honk If You LOve Peace And Quiet.



9. Remember, Half The People You Know Are Below Average.



10. He Who Laughs Last, Thinks Slowest.



11. Depression is Merely Anger Without Enthusiasm.



12 The Early Bird May Get The Worm, But The Second Mouse Gets the
Cheese.



13. I Drive Way Too Fast To Worry About Cholesterol.



14. Support Bacteria. They're The Only Culture Some People Have.



15. Monday Is An Awful Way To Spend 1/7 Of Your Week.



16. A Clear Conscience Is Usually The Sign Of A Bad Memory.



17. Change Is Inevitable, Except From Vending Machines.



18. Get A New Car For Your Spouse. It'll Be A Great Trade!



19. Plan To Be Spontaneous Tomorrow.



20. Always Try To Be Modest, And Be Proud Of It.



21. If You Think Nobody Cares, Try Missing A Couple Of Payments.



22. How Many Of You Believe In Psychokinesis? Raise My Hand.



23. OK,.... So What's The Speed of Dark?



24. How Do You Tell When You're Out Of Invisible Ink?



25. If Everything Seems To Be Going Well, You Have Obviously
Overlooked
Something.



26. When Everything Is Coming Your Way, You're In The Wrong Lane.



27. Hard Work May Pay Off In The Future, Laziness Pays Off Now.



28. Everyone Has A Photographic Memory, Some Just Do Not Have Film.



29 If Barbie Is So Popular, Why Do You Have To Buy Her Friends?



30. How Much Deeper Would The Ocean Be Without Sponges.?



31. Eagles May Soar, But Weasels Do Not Get Sucked Into Jet Engines.



32. What Happens If You Get Scared Half To Death Twice?



33. I Used To Have An Open Mind But My Brains Keep Falling Out.



34. I Couldn't Repair Your Brakes, So I Made Your Horn Louder.



35. Why Do Psychics Have To Ask You For Your Name?



36 Inside Every Older Person Is A Younger Person Wondering What
Happened.



37 Just Remember - If The World Did Not Suck, We Would All Fall Off.

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